Censorship can be fun!

So I've been listening to some new podcasts lately, and I'm really getting into This Week in Tech. It's informative, but it's also a lot of fun. Never thought I could listen to hours of people talking about computers and the Internet and love it, but I am.

One cool thing about listening to old tech stuff is that in a matter of weeks things they're talking or speculating about are already outdated. I picked up the show just in time to hear the panel get all hyped up for Windows 7. I wish I'd known it at the time, but Microsoft was actually asking people to host launch parties. Yup, get all your friends together, open a bag of pork rinds and we can all upgrade our operating systems! The best part is once you register your party, Microsoft sent you a party kit complete with:

• puzzle
• playing cards (you can already tell what kind of party this is going to be)
• napkins (Just 9, the number of guests you're supposed to invite so no slobs allowed)
• an autographed copy of Windows 7 (Not Bill's sig, some other guy's)
• Balloons
• Streamers

I could totally see doing this for the free upgrade, but anyone actually considering this to be a legit past time is someone I imagine would struggle to find the required 8 guests. But this isn't even the worst part. MS put out videos giving you helpful party planning hints to ensure your party is a success (even they knew these parties were doomed).

Why bring any of this up? Because somebody took the party tips video, chopped it down a little bit and bleeped out a couple of words and phrases. You can look for the unedited version if you want, but I don't know why. So here it is and, as usual, nothing dirty here. It's all in your head.

I don't get it

So it's getting to be that time of the year again. Yup, cruised the classifieds on Craigslist again on the off chance some lonely girl piques my interest.

There was no piquing.

Let's face it, it's still accepted that looking online for a companion is a last resort for only the loneliest of souls. I'm not saying it's true, but that stigma's still attached. So how is it I looked at profile after profile or women with a long list of very specific requirements. A certain height. NO facial hair. A bachelor's degree. That's right. If I wanted to date this girl I'd have to cough up $25,000 and a couple years of my life. Because, let's face it, what girl wants to date someone with only an associate's?

Now I just don't understand it. You can't find someone the normal way (I'm not judging, after all I was looking on there), so you ratchet up the expectations? And while some things are bonuses, should you really expect someone who is everything you require in a person to just show up? No flexibility on anything? Maybe it's just me, but as time goes on, my expectations and requirements are getting lower and fewer (All ten fingers?! She's on top of the list). Guess I'll have to wait until someone gets desperate enough to actually want to compromise between her dreams and reality. Evidently, that's going to be a long wait.

Asking for bad service?

Malia, Josh and I went out to Old Chicago Sunday night and I didn't care for our waitress. She was pleasant and all, but whenever she checked in on us, she was always in motion. It literally got to the point where if we asked for something she'd have to stop, turn around and ask us to repeat it, since she really had no intention of stopping for any reason.

Josh left the table to take a phone call. Malia took the opportunity to turn to me and say, "I'm so glad you're not cheap." Then I figured it all out. Josh and I split a pizza because it ended up being $1 cheaper than if we each got out own calzone. And while that may have left a bad impression with Malia, I'm sure it's when he asked the waitress if it "cost" to add mushrooms. She told him of course, it's a topping, and he told her they weren't really needed then.

And that was it. Out table had advertised to the waitress that we were cheap and she'd written us off. So it's just one more thing for you to think about the next time you're out. If nothing else, imply that good service will be rewarded. Save coupons until the end and don't bicker over pennies.

And don't forget, tip the price BEFORE any discounts. You still got full service.

Bad customer?

So as some of you may be aware, I've gone back to my roots and am working part time in Mexican fast food. Always nice to keep your hands in someone else's food, but it's a free meal and some extra spending cash. Just to be on the safe side, I'm not going to name the company here, but it's a smoked jalapeno.

Saturday we were pretty busy. Busy enough that they pulled me off of prep to clean the dining room. Part of that job, aside from the obvious, is touching tables, offering lids, seeing how the food was and all that.

One table struck me as funny. A mother and daughter were eating and I went over to see how they were doing. The mother looked up and raved, "Everything's just perfect, thank you so much." Ordinarily, I'd be quite happy with that response. But this lady was sitting behind her Burger King value meal. Looked like a chicken sandwich.

As politely as possible, I told her it's a good thing she was so happy. There's nothing I can do for her if she wasn't. For some reason I think this offended her, she got all defensive and she closed right up. In all honesty, it didn't bother me that she'd brought outside food in, her daughter still ate at my place. I just thought it was funny how she gushed over her food to me, as though I had anything to do with. Evidently, she just assumed all fast food workers are really in a secret society, working together towards world domination.

Next time I'm making sure they're eating our food before I ask. Or at least solicit some recommendations.

I'm back!

Hey all. So the Christmas season eventually took over the blogging and I've been spending quite a bit of time with a girl. Don't read anything into that, it is literally just spending time together, mostly eating and shopping at Target. Unfortunately, my new friendship has come at the cost of my blog. Well I'm hoping to get back to daily notes, but I have the feeling it'll settle somewhere around two or three posts a week. Still better than my latest average of none a week.

Last night we went to BJ's, a restaurant we'd visited before. I'm going to let the lousy service go because that isn't the point of this and it wasn't spectacularly bad. Just...not good.

I ordered the Parmesan crusted chicken and, while it was good, there was something that just struck me funny about it. Before breading and cooking the chicken breast, they cooks pound it nearly flat. I assume it's to keep the outside from burning before the middle is cooked. It's a sound principle, but it looks ridiculous. I end up with sitting behind a serving platter, literally, with two pieces of chicken that are each 8" across. To make them look even bigger, there's maybe a table spoon of sauce pooled in the corner of one piece. Evidently, the chicken's easy but the sauce is hard to come by.

The final difficulty I have is that my friend is on a diet. So while she's decided she's only eating half of her meal, no soda and definitely no dessert, I'm sitting in front of something that looks like its own buffet station. Hard part is, not only is it delicious but it's the only thing that ever sounds good. Guess I'll have to sacrifice a little dignity, but it's worth it.